Original Link: http://tansaexpress.com/2016/02/21/love-and-sex/


Love and SexLove and sex are subjects shrouded in myth and mistaken beliefs. Throughout time we have struggled with a moral dilemma that does not actually exits. It has been fostered by religion, parents trying to keep their daughters suitable for marriage and more.

Not only that, but because people who are in love engage sexually, it has become a tradition of sort, that love equals sex. It is assumed that engaging in sex is the result of Love.

But in an age of enlightenment, are we going to bow to the same old sacred cows? The answer will be yes unless we break it down and take a cold hard look at what love and sex truly are.


  1. Love and Lust Are Not Related


Let’s face it folks, lust is nothing more than a chemical reaction. It occurs in the body as a result of a release of hormones into the bloodstream. This is caused by visual stimulation. It is the result of the id, which is the small child inside all of us screaming for physical gratification.


Lust happens when the body is craving physical attention. It is the same thing as a craving for chocolate. When we covet our neighbor’s car we are in fact lusting for it. Lust is a call to be fed. And when it has been satisfied lust goes away.


  1. The Feeling of Love is a Vibration of the Body

I often hear people say they feel love for someone. We are all made of energy. Our bodies vibrate at different rates all the time. When a person experiences pleasure, the brain signals the body to release chemicals causing vibration at a rate we interpret as pleasurable. When this experience is the result of interaction with another person, we want more.

As humans we are want to put labels on things, especially feelings. So this we call love. But is it really love or just a vibration? In actuality the feeling of love is very similar to fear. Yes! It feels different but it is still a vibration of the body, brought on by stimulation which caused the body to release endorphins into the bloodstream.

  1. True Love is a Decision

Make no mistake. If you are in a relationship it is because you made the decision to be there. Love is simply a further extension of that decision. True Love is the decision to protect, provide for and nurture a person. It involves caring for them equal to or more than one’s self.

It has nothing to do with what you feel. It has nothing to do with sex. Love is knowing you will do what is right by someone no matter what the cost to you. Love is actually a really strong friendship. (Hopefully with sex)

How to Reconcile Love and Sex

Love and sex 2

So you’re not in a relationship and you spy someone who really gets your juices flowing. Should you go for it? I say yes. Provided you know the person is safe of course.

If you’re in a relationship and you spy someone you really want to experience sexually, what then. I say go for it. You are not truly cheating unless you enter into an actual relationship.

Sex is not an affair. Relationship is. So feel free to feed the id, but always be mindful of your relationship to the one you truly love.






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