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Original Link: http://www.vampirefragments.com/articles_spurn_001.php
Posted by Spurn on the 18th of March 2017
Vampires relinquishing responsibility
Some newly awakened vampires, and even some vampires in general, have acquired the trend of relying on other vampires, to become balanced or fed, by healing or other means thus giving up their independence and control over their own vampirism. This drains the vampires in the community who are helping these young ones, but also stagnates the growth of the young and newly awakened, as they aren't subjected to any learning experiences, on their own in relation to their vampiric condition.
The reason for this happening seems to be that vampires strive to help and support each other in the global community, but instead of primarily giving guidance, when needed, there has been a lot of nurturing. Ideally, vampires shouldn't be nurtured, unless they are in a critical state, but learn in their own way, how to take responsibility and care for their own vampirism and self-identification. An awakening is certainly difficult, to say the least, and being a vampire in itself is a challenging life with a lot of ups and downs in which one must deal. Nevertheless, we should keep in mind, that without experiences of overcoming the absolute bottom and managing the absolute top, one will never learn how to place oneself in-between the two extremes.
As with other numerous articles, the topic of "who to blame for the responsibility" is at hand. By default and almost by tradition, the Elders and/or the Leaders are pointed out as being those who are to blame for things. In reality no one is accountable for anybody else other than themselves. If a vampire isn't taking responsibility for their own condition (working with their own vampirism or seeking guidance), then it is that vampire's problem, and not anyone else period. If one chooses to nurture another vampire (be it a critical situation or not), it will become that person's problem when it blows up in his or her face. One is only to blame for one's own actions and choices, not the actions or choices of others.
Elders, leaders and grounded vampires as role-models
Over the years, the terms "Elder" and "Leader" have been discussed many times, and the definition of both is necessary in order to understand the difference between them in relation to the topic of them being role-models for other vampires in the global community.
In its core, the term "Elder" is used in the community about a vampire, who has been in the community for many years and/or have achieved a lot of merit for their work in and with the community. Elders are those who give guidance when it is sought from them, and who give it when it is needed. Elders aren't pulling the strings, but they still work with the community because they care.
Leaders, on the other hand, don't necessarily need to have been in the community for many years; they just choose to be leaders (by nature). By starting a group or stepping up their game, by trying to pull the strings (on a scale, both big and small), leaders make the decisions, the calls, and they are the ones who set the path for the group(s) they are leading. Any grounded vampire, elder or leader in the community isn't responsible for what others do, but one must remember, that what one does still affects the thoughts, beliefs and actions of the ones who are new to the community. Being a role-model is as such: your behavior, attitude and values (in any form, passive or active) can be emulated by others, and they will be. If you are in any way visible in the community, either online or offline, be it Facebook-groups (or similar), chats, discussions, articles, websites, videos, TV-shows, at events in the community, on the streets of your city, your personal record, what people say about you - everything that is available to the public can be interpreted and emulated. All this can have an effect on the young when they try to identify themselves with vampires in the community. So to some extent one might say that we all have a responsibility, not just the elders and leaders of the community - everyone in the community has a responsibility for what they actually portray. You choose to become a role-model, when you act in and are part of the community. A final point in relation to both; no elder or leader is alike, just as no vampire is alike.
While on the subject of role-models, let's talk about documentaries and television-series. There has been loads of these shows with real life vampires, where vampires are being portrayed in different ways, some positive, and some negative (sometimes caused by the production). Some vampires in these shows are part of the community, some are not, but no-matter what is actual truth or fiction for them, those who try to mirror themselves with the vampires in the community, go to these vampire-characters first and see them as role-models. Thus they tend to emulate the behaviors, views, beliefs, fashion etc. of these TV-vampires.
Then there are news-reports of people molesting and killing people and/or animals because they believe that they are fictional vampires of legend and mythologies. When these two things connect, misinterpretation is not far away, and the global vampire community's reputation is at stake. This is why it has been and still is important to educate, guide and illuminate what the vampire community is, and distance the community from populism and sensationalism-reports of ravage vampires. Vampires in general do know reality from populism and sensationalism, and find their way into the community, either in real life or online, but here there's still the risk of misinterpretation and misconception.
All groups, associations and individuals in the vampire community are different, and thus they portray different views and beliefs, which they in turn act on. Vampires in general are not alike at all, besides the fundamentally sound and agreed upon: "need-to-feed", so it is very clear that there exists different dynamics, especially when talking about a world wide community.
Dynamics and differences
The vampire community is very extensive, and many countries are involved (if not all of them), and thus it is important to point out, that with this multitude of cultures and demographics, there will unavoidably exist different paradigms of politics, ethics, religions and beliefs, which in their various compositions will create different dynamics (internally and externally) in relation to other countries or areas of the world (including the vampire community).
Even though we all can agree on this (hopefully), we still talk about rules and regulations in the community; like how to treat a donor, how to safely drain blood, how to treat animals, how to act in the community, how to handle the beast, and how one should behave concerning the media. Most of us take in high regard that you should behave properly, and that you must always be safe when you feed, but is it really that surprising, with a worldwide community, that there exist radical opposite views on vampirism on what is right and wrong, and that this can spark violence and hate between groups or individuals of different ideologies?
A "draining" conclusion
I'm not sure about when vampires began asking for excessive healing and help from each other on a weekly basis, but one thing is certain; the concept of responsibility for learning and controlling one's own vampirism has faded away. It has been replaced by an intertwined dependency on other vampires, and a mutual dependency between vampires – in relation to the concept of healing and/or giving energy. Simultaneously with both of these topics, there is also emulation of drama in the community, and it has been going on, literally, forever. This drama is likely caused by different dynamics on both a small and large scale, since the community is so vast and has so many facets to it.
Nevertheless, I believe that we can become more aware of ourselves as vampires, role-models, and communities. We need to take care of ourselves, no-matter how much we disagree; and we have to accept and respect that not everyone in the world can have the same views and ideals. I know that people want to help each other, but we also need to give guidance where it is needed, and not where it is demanded. Sometimes silence is the push in the right direction for one to become accountable for ones own actions and vampirism. When you can't agree with all parts of the community, then you have to take responsibility into your own hands. This means that you shouldn't blame others for your own miscomings and that you must believe in yourself, take care of yourself and do what feels right in relation to your own convictions. Don't push these things upon others. They have to find their own way.
Note
A big thank you to Heidica Northernlight, Lono, Octarine Valur and Vodalok Nightkiller for the skype-conversation on this topic back in 2016, which sparked the thoughts for this article. Also thank you to Carol Dharkling for editing and revision.
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